Queen Lea

 After being hurt in one of the worst ways by Jay I wrote this to let out my feelings towards him after he betrayed me yet again.............      I'm sadden to see how things ended between me and you because this is not what I wanted I thought we can some how be friends and still be in each others' lives at a small level but you showed me that you don't want to be friends and hurt me in the worst way. If you think what you did was justified it wasn't. I wanted us to stop hurting one another and just remove romance from the equation and be friends but you couldn't do that instead you let another woman who is insecure and I don't know disrespect me! I NEVER DID THAT TO YOU AND YOU KNOW IT! I was shocked because I don't even know her and I don't want to be with you so I didn't understand her issue. I felt as if she was intimidated by me and what we had but she shouldn't be at all. I'm disgusted in your behavior. I'm going to be just ...

      Jay and I have been through a lot in the past five years. We have both caused one another a lot of pain and hurt but at the end of the day we still love one another; even though things may never work out between us. We both have decided to go our separate ways and I feel that is what's best maybe one day we can rekindle some form of a friendship. Nobody will ever understand our connection like we do but sometimes what we want isn't always what's best for us. Even though this man can give me mixed singles such as saying "I  still love you so much. I miss you and think about you. I want to marry you" (but two weeks later you tell me you are supposedly going to marry another woman doesn't make sense to me but whatever) I know I can not go back down that road.     We share so many good times! I remember when we would say up for hours just talking about everything. We would sometimes talk until the sun came up. We would take drives and just listen ...

Last summer (June 2012) I had an internship at the children's agency. I loved it!! I had fun and it was an rewarding experience. while interning there I never knew I would meet somebody and fall head over kneels for them. In the unit I interned for there was this nice looking black man named Ricky (not his real name). I never really thought anything of him, he was just a nice looking man. One day I went out in field with him and we talked and got to know other another and flirted a little. As time went on I started to develop a little crush for him but I never expected that to go anywhere for he was in a relationship so it couldn't. While lets just say over the summer our hormones and desires got the best of us. The following week when we was out in the field at the end of the day he dropped me off back by the office and I hugged him and as we slowly pulled away....he kissed! A part of me expected it but also a part of me was shocked; I wanted to pull away because this wasn...

It all started when I was in the 8th grade. I had this crush on this boy named Jay.  When i was around him I would get butterflies in my stomach (even though this may seem cliche its true) and not know what to say...I had the biggest crush on this boy. We started to talk and flirt a little while in school. Then came our 8th grade prom....to make a long story short he was my first kiss. The one thing I'll remember about him besides his temper is those soft lips that I can kiss all night! I remember during school when we had recess we would go hide under one of the staircases by the exit and just talk ...well to be honest mainly make-out the whole time! Those were the days!.... Once we graduated form elementary school  we still kept in touch but after a few months we lost contact of one another. Four years later......... I was a Freshmen in college and currently in a relationship with Boy #1: Big Poppa. However every now and then ever since we lost contact I would think about ...