Last summer (June 2012) I had an internship at the children's agency. I loved it!! I had fun and it was an rewarding experience. while interning there I never knew I would meet somebody and fall head over kneels for them. In the unit I interned for there was this nice looking black man named Ricky (not his real name). I never really thought anything of him, he was just a nice looking man. One day I went out in field with him and we talked and got to know other another and flirted a little. As time went on I started to develop a little crush for him but I never expected that to go anywhere for he was in a relationship so it couldn't. While lets just say over the summer our hormones and desires got the best of us. The following week when we was out in the field at the end of the day he dropped me off back by the office and I hugged him and as we slowly pulled away....he kissed! A part of me expected it but also a part of me was shocked; I wanted to pull away because this wasn't right a part of me just wanted to climb on top of that boy....My evil side won...
After that moment things just progressed from there and we got closer and closer. I know what was happening was wrong concerning he was in a relationship so a part of me was prepared for things not to end the way I would want them to between us. Ricky was different than the previous guys in my life...even though every guy in my life is different in their own way..no one is a like. Ricky would compliment me on the littlest things from my glasses to ...my nails... the outfit I had on that day..just everything! He would make me feel like I was the most beautiful woman in the world and that was refreshing for me. He's Caribbean and they just go about things differently than other men...while Caribbean men in general are just different from other races! (in both good and bad ways).
My internship ended but we still talked almost everyday and when I would come home from college we would see each other. Everything was going fine until we started to argue more. From the start I wanted us to be real and honest with one another concerning the situation....its funny how I wanted him to be honest and real with me for he wasn't that way with the woman he has at home. In the beginning of November I came home one weekend and he came over to visit. His birthday was in late October so I had a little gift (a card and a little present). So he came over and got his gift and we chatted for a little. When we hugged and kissed goodbye things kind of escalated from there and one thing lead to another and..... IT just happened. You could cut the sexual tension with a knife but I also more confused then ever. For I let myself get emotionally attached to this boy when I knew nothing would happen between and to be honest I really didn't expect it to anyway. We talked a little more as the day went on but then all of a sudden I was not hearing from him. We didn't talk for for about nine months. One day I got an email from him out of the blue just saying how apologetic he was for everything that had gone on. I appreciated the apology but felt I could not go back down that road. While I was out running errands I ran into Ricky and was completely caught of guard. We started to talk little by little each day and things heated up a bit; at this time he was single but I didn't want to go down that because he could do the same thing he did to his Ex to me. I would be a fool to think otherwise. Also I started to get back in contact with Jay (Boy #2) and I wanted to see if things would work out with him.
Fast Forward to present day: Him and I would go through moments when we would be in contact and other moments we wouldn't. I was focused on the man I was dating at the time and wanted to work out things with him. Ricky and I do have a great deal of love for one another but me and him just wont even work. I don't see him as somebody who I would marry and settle down with just a good friend who makes me laugh, makes me good drinks and good food. We still talk every now and again and have developed a good friendship.
After that moment things just progressed from there and we got closer and closer. I know what was happening was wrong concerning he was in a relationship so a part of me was prepared for things not to end the way I would want them to between us. Ricky was different than the previous guys in my life...even though every guy in my life is different in their own way..no one is a like. Ricky would compliment me on the littlest things from my glasses to ...my nails... the outfit I had on that day..just everything! He would make me feel like I was the most beautiful woman in the world and that was refreshing for me. He's Caribbean and they just go about things differently than other men...while Caribbean men in general are just different from other races! (in both good and bad ways).
My internship ended but we still talked almost everyday and when I would come home from college we would see each other. Everything was going fine until we started to argue more. From the start I wanted us to be real and honest with one another concerning the situation....its funny how I wanted him to be honest and real with me for he wasn't that way with the woman he has at home. In the beginning of November I came home one weekend and he came over to visit. His birthday was in late October so I had a little gift (a card and a little present). So he came over and got his gift and we chatted for a little. When we hugged and kissed goodbye things kind of escalated from there and one thing lead to another and..... IT just happened. You could cut the sexual tension with a knife but I also more confused then ever. For I let myself get emotionally attached to this boy when I knew nothing would happen between and to be honest I really didn't expect it to anyway. We talked a little more as the day went on but then all of a sudden I was not hearing from him. We didn't talk for for about nine months. One day I got an email from him out of the blue just saying how apologetic he was for everything that had gone on. I appreciated the apology but felt I could not go back down that road. While I was out running errands I ran into Ricky and was completely caught of guard. We started to talk little by little each day and things heated up a bit; at this time he was single but I didn't want to go down that because he could do the same thing he did to his Ex to me. I would be a fool to think otherwise. Also I started to get back in contact with Jay (Boy #2) and I wanted to see if things would work out with him.
Fast Forward to present day: Him and I would go through moments when we would be in contact and other moments we wouldn't. I was focused on the man I was dating at the time and wanted to work out things with him. Ricky and I do have a great deal of love for one another but me and him just wont even work. I don't see him as somebody who I would marry and settle down with just a good friend who makes me laugh, makes me good drinks and good food. We still talk every now and again and have developed a good friendship.
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