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Boy #1: Big Poppa....My First Love

Boy #1: Aden, P.S. for the men I talk about in my posts I changed their name.
I met Aden in college when I was a Freshmen and he was a Senior. I'm a girl who is into older men as you will see in later posts. I remember the first time I met him was in the University cafe and I thought to myself "Damn thats a big n***a" lol... not fat wise he was just really tall and big to me since I was only 5'3" and he is like 6 foot. I could of never imagined what would happen between us in the next few months to come. I never expected to fall for a guy like him; I'm a girl who is more into the bad boy, player type of dude who keeps you on your toes. Aden is not at all a bad boy or player but he did keep me on my toes but in a good way. Aden was different than any other guy before that I talked to. He did things for me that no other man did and it was quite refreshing so I decided to give him a chance. We spent more and more time together and got to know each other and eventually it bloomed into a relationship. The funny part about that is he never really asked me to be his girlfriend; he kind of just told me. One day he introduced me to his roommate's friend as his girlfriend! I was kind of taken a back for we never really talked that nor did he ask but at that moment I didnt say anything to him. Later on that day I asked him, "When did I become your girlfriend?"....He said "Valentine's Day" ....I still to this day don't recall him asking me but he swears up and down he did so I jus left it at that and from there on he became MY MAN!

 I live in New Jersey and he lives in Virginia so I knew going into this that once he graduated and went back home this would be a long distance relationship. But I truly did care for him and wanted to make it work so I was up for the challenge. He was my first boyfriend plus the relationship would become long distance so that was double the stress and hard work to keep the relationship growing. When he graduated and went back home, it was hard for me at first because I was so use to seeing him everyday. Not being able to see him for weeks or months at a time started to get to me at first but then I realized anything worth having is worth fighting for.

Every relationship has its problems but after a little over a year into the relationship things started to get worse. With the constant arguing and stuff we thought it would be best to go our separate ways. We were in different places in our lives and it just wasn't working out....Now for the break-up part that was rough. I didn't deal with the break-up well at all; I was overly emotional and heart-broken. Things got so bad we didn't talk for a little over a year.....no communication at all not even Facebook friends! I now understand how to deal with certain situations a little better. We went  our separate ways and I started to date other people and focus on me! After we ended things I realized it was for the best. I was 18 when I met him and when we got together I started to surround my life around his and didn't really know what I wanted out of life for me. During the time of me being single I learned a lot about myself and grew a lot as a woman. I did things for me and figured out what career path I want to take.

Around December of this past year I got a text from his mother out the blue (she was always a sweet lady and I would of loved to have her as a mother-in-law). She was just checking in on me and wanted to say hi; which I thought was very sweet of her concerning me and her son weren't together anymore and we haven't talked in a year.  I decided that I wanted to send Aden a letter just say my peace and for us to put the past behind us and try to be cordial. I didn't expect anything for him; to my surprise he agreed to putting the past in the past and communicate again. Ever since then me and him have talked on and off nothing serious. These past couple of months me and him have been talking more and more with a little flirting in the mix. Everything was going fine and I was patient as to what would happen in the future between me and him.

Things between me and him are a bit shaking. I personally feel as if he gives off mixed messages and I don't like when somebody plays with my emotions or leads me on. We both know if things were to grow into something more that we would have a stronger and better relationship than we did in the past. I'm not going to sit around and wait forever...Sometimes its just better to close the door instead of waiting for somebody to come through the door. For right now I'm just going to live my life and focus on me!!

 

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